Cheated

I cheated myself. My mind playing mind games with me. And then suddenly I realized.

This is all fucking bullshit because I was just being too stressed.

It came back because I was going through depression. I just need to be acquainted.

I was once there. Twice. Thrice. Time and again. Then I realized, I am actually activating my illusionary fuckup world once again. Now I really get it.

I need to get out more, think more outside the box. It is this stupid fuckup cheating mindset that had let me contemplate the stupidest thing ever to be considered. It might be a possibility but its simply fuckup because I put too much energy focusing on it. Fucking dumb.

Suddenly, everything comes to light. Yes. Enlighten. I should have ask at first place, why should I even bother? You are just one in millions, and I deserved much better. Much much better than what I thought that you are. The best, irreplaceable. Nonsense. Totally utterly nonsense. Certain Three Days Grace songs speak my heart now.

Thanks for all the enlightening THE certain people had gave to me. You know who you are. Although it might sound bullcrap to me then, it is words of wisdom to me now.

I will get through this. I had and I will. Maybe for the last time.