Movie Run

Prior to the Academy Awards (aka Oscars), I made an mild attempt to watch all the films that is nominated for the awards. They call it Oscarian mania. Whatever.

As of 24th February 2007, 12.45pm, I almost made it. Almost.

I made it through only for the Best Motion Picture.










































And the Oscars goes to....
Letters of Iwo Jima..or thats what I think. Basically, the tempo's just nice, plot's nice although they are babbling in Kunichiwa-language and admirable scenes.

As for others, Babel's too slow, The Queen's too monotonous, The Departed has too many fucks (I preferred the Cantonese version actually, esp. the casting), Little Miss Sunshine's pretty but I doubt they give awards to dark comedies.

As of other films that worth mentioning that is part of the nominees in other categories. I recommended these:

Its in Spanish, big possibility for Best Foreign Film.
Originality is its selling point.











One of Leo's greatest characters, tho I really like Djimon Hounsou's performance. I always like bring-to-awareness and almost factual movies. Action-packed is its bonus.











Another with a fresh plot. Clive Owen's good here.

(spoiler)
Julian Moore died too fast tho.
























Both are about magicians. Both are about jealousy. Both are about the drive of love. Both have a lot of competitions in the film. Both plots twist like roller-coasters. Both are good. Obviously.

Nominated films that I looked forward to:
















Oh great...another one jz finishes its download. I jz love the kind and Sharing people out there.
Popcorn's out.

Over.

Foot Attack!!

Scene 1



















Scene 2




















Scene 3




















Out of boredom of course.....XP

Genting - Brief Version

In this el-nino type of weather, it's hard to resist a trip to a cool foggy place some hundred-metres more-above-sea-level-place. Further encouraged by the fact that exams are just over, a sip of cool breeze is most essentially needed. Having said that, Genting is almost inevitable to stop by.
















The trip up. Up and away.

This time around, I try to minimize my spendings and as a result, no theme park and whatsoever alike. And almost suffering from booze phobia, I promised not to make my arteries and ventricles overworked and overloaded. So whats the fun you asked? Just need a cool refreshing atmosphere and fresher air here.

Courtesy of Adam and his parents, we already got our rooms when we touched down. No swiping of cards and queues needed here. Save a helluva energy.

After the meet the parents session, we had a dose of PS2 with Ad's bro before going for the film The Guardian. Worth mentioning that is a great movie. Simple plot but good acting from Costner and Ash "Punk'd" Kutcher especially.

As I have said, saving was part of my plan, and I granted it. Just so you dunno, you can spend below 10 bucks for a meal in Genting, stomach fully loaded. Yeap. All you have to do is a lil' exploring down a gloomy car park. They install a freaking mamak restaurant there. Possibly for staffs, but its always a bonus to have adventurous, tight-budgeted customers around. My dinner only cost RM5.70 consisting of nasi kandar and a teh o panas. Ain't normal for a place own by Goh Tong.

Moving on, we entertain ourselves with the idiot box before having the usual custom-booze session(did i jz say "usual"?). And you know the story, the always-got-people-get-drunk-story.















The culprit - Bombay Sapphire

Its nice with 7-up and even nicer with orange juice. 47% of alcohol is way too much to drink it straight, well, at least it applies to only some.

The effect?




















Yeah...Thommy...thx for the portrait. XD















The insanity and the fantasy
















The aftermath

It's always a type of relief to go all out partying after a dull monotonous life as an undergrad. Especially if an entertainment centre is jz 45 minutes away from where you are studying.
Happy hols and Gong Xi Fat Chai!

Gong Xi Gong Xi

Kiong Hee! Kiong Hee!

Time seems to fly and by now is the Babi year, and that means yet another circle of zodiac is complete.

Anyway, Chinese New Year is a time when people who haven't sign the happily-ever-after papers receive their ang pows. Not forgetting too, the garbage collectors. They come in cranky smelly garbage trucks to beg for ang pows and as if you don't give them, ur gate will definitely be crashed down by their tanks...er..trucks.

The build-up to the first day of CNY is definitely a busy week. Besides the spring cleanings, it's time for now-or-never buddy gatherings and hectic movie catch up-ings. In fact, with the upgrade from dial-up to Streamyx at home, cinemas aren't always the destination to rush to for movies anymore. Imagine having an average-70-kbps(for my standard, that is freaking fast!) downloader deployed at home and an average of 2 movies per day. All you have to do is clicking off the mouse and by tomorrow, sit back and enjoy.

Enough said there. As for Chinese New Year, it is always the expectation of having family members gathering around and trips to each and every relatives' house to expand your ang pau collections. Forget gambling in my family. We don't. No kidding here. No chua tai ti. No mahjongs. Uh-huh. Boring? Far from it.

















I thanked everyone that wishes me Happy Chinese New Year through SMS, cards and every media available. I kinda lazy to wish back each and everyone of you. XD. Anyways, I am wishing you guys here Happy Chinese New Year and may everything be fine in the year of the Pig! Take care guys.

Lalalalala....

Its been soo long since the last post. I got blogger's block.
Or rather, that's merely an excuse for "lazy to write anything".

And so it seems, that after a long absence, there will be tons of posts to be posted up here. So it seems. In reality, there isn't. Coz I kinda bogged down to remember what happened everyday and recorded it here. So for now, I'll just write whatever comes to mind..

Exams are over....yay.

Notice that it isn't "Exams ARE OVER!!....YAAAAYYY!!"

Well, probably, I wasn't going through some major make-or-break type of examination. Just some college stuff. And partly, I wasn't doing well in the exams.

In fact, I rate my performance for this sem's exam as sucky. Sucked real bad. I can always blame the exams question for being hard-core difficult and tricky and not-for-our-standards and bullshit questions came out. But that's only part of it. One major factor that I think it sucks, is that I, as always the usual case for everybody in every situation, did not prepare well. Admittedly. And yeap, that's of it. The results will tell. Till then, I should probably enjoy my hols.

CNY is a stone's throw away. It doesn't feel right when you can't feel the atmosphere. Well, one of my floormates tried hard by blasting CNY musics through Altec Lensing 2.1 Speakers, but that doesn't help much. I hypothesize maybe its the amount of time spent with family. The lesser time spent with family, the lesser the feeling is. Afterall, CNY is about quality time spent with family members. So, maybe I should get that feeling right before the eve of CNY. Hopefully.

All these blah-blahs is to try to reignite the writing feeling. So, this blog sounds very pointless.
But at least, I wrote something.

Songs Related to Exams

Songs that will spur you to work harder, the motivation type:
Blow Me Away – Breaking Benjamin
Keep Holding On – Avril Lavigne
It’s Not Over – Daughtry
Die Another Day – Madonna
Hold On – Good Charlotte

Songs that describes pre exam period:
Temperature – Sean Paul
We’ll Be Burning – Sean Paul

Songs that remind us the uselessness of exam:
I Just Wanna Live – Good Charlotte

Songs that makes you think that there is still hope:
Wish I – Jem
Savin’ Me – Nickelback
When You Believe – Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey
We Believe – Good Charlotte
24 – Jem
Gone – Switchfoot

Songs that makes you have false hope:
Maybe Tomorrow - Stereophonics

Songs about tips for exams:
I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing - Aerosmith

Songs that you needed right before u go into the exam hall:
Learning to Breathe – Switchfoot
Open Your Eyes – Alter Bridge

Songs that says that you are practically game-overed:
If You’re Gone – Matchbox 20
Fortune Faded – Red-Hot Chilli Papers
Get Stoned – Hinder
Say Goodbye – Theory of a Deadman
End of Me – Marion Raven
Bad Day – Daniel Powter
Six Feet Under - Creed

Songs that describe the exam questions:
Unpredictable – Jamie Foxx ft Ludacris
The Hardest Thing – 98 Degrees
Stuck – Stacie Orrico

Songs to listen to when you can’t finish your paper on time:
What Took You So Long – Emma Bunton

Songs that gave u the wrong impression:
Listen to Your Heart – DHT (Noo…never do that….listen to your brain, dude.)

Songs that is listened to after a long period of exams:
Numb – Linkin Park
The Anthem – Good Charlotte

Songs that makes you think that you’ve write the right answer:
Vindicated – Dashboard Conventionals

Songs that indicated that you cheated in the exam:
Dirty Little Secrets – All-American Rejects
Somebody Told Me – The Killers

Songs to listen to if you get 4.0 GPA:
Greatest Story Ever Told – Oliver James
World Greatest – R. Kelly

Songs that indicates you have learned your lessons:
Won’t Get Fooled Again – The Who

Songs that describes you after a long period of exam:
Zombie – The Cranberries
Crazy – Alanis Morisette

Songs that indicates that exam is over:
Breathe Easy – Blue
It Ends Tonight – All American Rejects
Celebrate The Day – Herbert Gronemayer
I’m Not Missing You – Stacie Orrico

At last...

At long, long, last....

A win for 'Pool against millionaire Chelski. How often can you get that since Roman's Relovution in Stamford Bridge?

In fact, in the Premiership, none. And...that is, until now.

2-nil win. Convincing and satisfying. Actually, I am still pinching my cheeks to believe that.




















Scorer Dirk Kuyt with 2 thumbs up. Shweet.

Not that Liverpool was THAT bad. In fact, it was just plain logic that sooner or later, they are going to bite off the ass of Chelsea and shut Mourinho's arrogant shit hole (which happens to be attached to where a normal person's mouth position).















Moaningho shaking hands after loosing? What? Probably he had fever.

Conceding goals in consecutive matches, even to just-promoted Reading, was a sign that Chelsea isn't invincible just because they manage to bring expensive glittering stars like buying nasi-lemak in a warungs. Ballack and Shevchenko? More like fading stars.

And in the wake of the Reds vs Blues game, #130-000 per week Ballack was strolling on the field serving as a spectator more than a player. 30 million pounds Sheva was warming the bench.














Chelsea's Cech: " I feel like playing rugby than footie...can I?"

And it only took 18 minutes for Liverpool to kill off the game.

The current situation was that Liverpool were trying hard to erase 2 horrible tragic-memories in Anfield. Namely 2 Arsenal visits for Carling and Fa Cup where 12 goals were at the back of Liv's net. Eeew....disgusting.

And it proved a remedy, a sweet remedy this time around beating, for the first time since Benitez's reign 3 seasons ago, Chelsea in the league.

And of course Chelsea can always come up with excuses like lack of defenders, esp. Terry, and the just recovered Cech as GK. But the reality is, they sucked in the game.

It is not a frequent event to see a grand win like this in Liverpool these days, therefore do excuse the insults and patronizing done in this blog. Chelsea fans, another time, eh? Hehe.

And after this match, Liverpool....title contenders?

Maybe la...

Condemned

I suppose I am in denial. But who the fuck cares right? So I decided to write this blog in a third person view.

He studied for 45 minutes. Then an idea struck him. He decided to sms. She replied. He happy. She said she coming. He lagi happy. So he waited and waited.

She come half an hour late. He doesn’t mind. But she was 3 tables away. She din see him. But she messaged asking where are you. He went to her. He smiled. She smiled. He notice the table was full. She said she can come to his table.

And that’s where everything turned upside down, inside out.

He said its ok if she want to sit with her friends. She din say anything.She nodded.He went to his table. He started to regret. He asked himself what the fuck is he thinking. He looked back at her table. She din turn back. He wanted to go her table. There was no place. He stared back in his book. He wished she came to her table. It did not happen. He disappointed. He looked back several times. No response. He tried to sms her to come to his table. He did not do it. He began to wonder if he had balls. He can’t concentrate. He thought of the “so near yet so far” concept. He felt stupid. He felt useless. He felt he was going to be the failure of mankind.

Then, someone left her table. There was space. He went to her table which took him 15 minutes to ponder. He sat. She din look up. He felt hopeless. He stared at book again. She asked friends about a question. He listened. She asked his opinion. He answered. He guessed that she wasn’t convinced. He asked whether he had help. She said yes. He guessed she just don’t want to hurt him. He felt stupid. She then asked about something else. Not to him. He just listened. She din ask his opinion anymore. He stared back at his book. And in 5 minutes time, she felt like leaving. She left. She said bye. He said bye. He JUST said bye. That’s all. He thinks that she was disappointed. He tried to say something else. She pretended to walk slowly. He did not say anything. He felt stuck. His brain was blank. She went away with her friend. He felt like banging his head on the wall. He felt like shouting. He just stared at his book for the next 30 minutes. Then he decided to leave.

On the way home, he looked at the sky and asked why? Nobody answered him. He shook his head. He felt devastated. He scratched his head. He was blank. He was confused.

And there goes the confident. There goes the enthusiasm. There goes hope. There goes everything. It felt like déjà vu.

He walked back to his room with heavy steps. He wished he did not live today. He wished there was no today.

Wanted: Exam Mood

It is not always easy to dig out the mood that was inhibited by 3 months plus period. In fact, as we proceed to the almost-finale of our course, the tendency to bog down midway is especially obvious.


Perhaps the above poster will help. But it takes more than that. The effort, the stimulation, the motivation, the aura, the mood, , the expectation, the pressure, the passion (hmm...doesn't really fit here..)...you name it. It certainly needed a whole lot bunch of criteria to really settle down and to bury your head into a pile (or maybe 2, 3, 4 piles?) of literature of theories or philosophies.

Damn. And to think that time and tide is in dominant position against me, it just make matters worst. Week 13. 10 ++ (as in Jan 7) from now, I'll be over-fried meat if I don't complete 5 subjects of 18 credit hours in time.

Really, for this time....my verdict would be : Die liao laa.....

Be a South Parker!

Damn.

I was given a part in the notorious sick-kids animation, South Park. And being credited as Sinner.

Portrait as a bespectacled, durian-shape hairstyle, injury prone (note the plaster), sporty, unlucky looser (indicated by "13 BASTARD" sign on the jersey), hopeless in relationship (note the signboard indicating "Warning: Girl Snatched Away.") and sinister pain-in-the-ass boy. And by the way, definitely a distinguishable South Parker famous for his foul language, specialized in Chinese dialect versions.

Want a role in South Park? Try it here

Good luck in the audition. XP.

Break needed! (Pt.2)

Thursday, 28th Dec. 2006

Dad’s birthday. No presents for him tho. Bad son. But celebrated with the cousins and aunts with a feast at night. Spend the whole day with dad is the best I can compensate for the no-present-clause.

Friday, 29th Dec. 2006

Chatted and updated my database with old best mate, CJ before his departure to the States in January. We started out life after secondary single and amateurs in relationships. I remembered he proposed this get-GF-in-two-years-time resolution before we went our own way. Its two years now. And he succeeded. As for me leh.....no comment. He tried not to laugh his ass out but and as usual failed terribly. Bloody hell.



















Hhh...I got d....When you want to get yours?

Went to Queensbay with Rach and YW. Did some window shopping and targeted a few tops and jeans. Promised self will be back with parents and cash. XP.

Saturday, 30th Dec. 2006

Another day of ass-warming. Spend the afternoon getting rid of viruses and spywares. My family just don’t get what I was doing and always attempted to switch off the computer. Frustrating la. I mean, just chill la, it won’t hurt if the PC’s on for the whole day. It hurts when you see the Trojans mulled their horses through your PC. Gave a lecture of the importance of “modification” of the PC.

And finally, at long long last, I am getting myself contact lenses. Initially, I don’t expect my mom will comply, but hey..Guess I hit at the right time in requesting (or isit just my persuasion skills getting better?) for a thing that I had proposed for like two years. It wasn’t easy to put in at first. I attempted 3 times on my right eye and 6 times on my left eye. It was a nervy process. The optometrist was patient tho, thank goodness. By the way, its 20 bucks per month for one year. Kinda cheap I guess.











Tested out on the field and it feels good. I moved more freely around without the specs dangling loose like some nerd-head roaming clumsily in the field.

Sunday, December 31, 2006

Went to temples and monasteries in several parts of Penang to pray. It was exhausting. So many things to do and remember in the prayers. Fortunately, mom is at my side or else I might get struck by lightning someway through.

Amazingly(or not), it was a peaceful New Year’s Day for me. Was suppose to have fun in Gurney, but then my aunt came into the picture with her Toto (or whichever) winning money and decided to chia us for a scrumptious feast. And that’s where the dilemma came in. My cousin, Andrew, had the same thing on mind and called me for consultation. In the end, we decided to set family as priority. Big sacrifice…not really.

We ended up having dinner with aunts and uncles and took up (again?) our commentating job.

Monday, January 1st 2006….oh, wait….2007.

Happy New Year! Or rather happy new year…..

Decided to try out the Shanghai Dim Sum near Queensbay Mall. And the conclusion? I rather opt for any local coffee-shop style Dim Sum. The options there are so limited that you get only one type of siu mai and one type of har kau. And it took a long time to serve up the food. Blah. From now on, I decided there will be no more restaurant-style-dim sum (the previous one in Hotel Equatorial was a disaster…waited half an hour for 3 pieces of siu mai).

And it was Queensbay again. This time armed with mom and dad. XD. After some serious browsing and considerations, which of course is due to limited cash, landed 4 tops and one pair of jeans, with only RM150 in exchange. Kinda a bargain.

Tuesday is the round-up for the a-week-plus-holiday. Departed to KL in style tho. Paid extra RM11 for personal screen sits. Took advantage of it by watching 2 movies and the next thing I knew, I was already at Pudu. Worth the money, planned to do that everytime other time. ^.^.

Time flies. And I meant it seriously. In less than one month, Armageddon strikes and there was no sign of preparation yet.

As usual, the motto in the next few weeks will be…
Die liao la……

Break needed! (Pt.1)

A brief holiday is essentially needed. And it came just in time, after massacred a holocaust of assignments, mid-terms and presentations, I really needed time-off. It wasn’t easy to get a leave from college. But thanks to the numerous occasions (which included my grams’ death anniversary, dad’s b’day and also Xmas and New Year), I can’t get a more sensible excuse (or rather reason, a better word) to retreat myself from the hectic schedule. And I promised myself I will fully utilize the week-long break.

And I guess I did.

Friday, 22^nd Dec. 2006

The moment I reached Penang Bridge, my friend, Rach already bugged and begged me to club that night. She assured me full coverage, meaning the fees. Oh well, since that’s the case, I obliged. Reached the bus station 2230, reached Esplanade 2315. Frantic sial. Even more frantic was the process. I had to rush from Glo to SS and back again, different occasion. Damn the pei min custom. I think I got high from rushing here and there than from dancing and drinking. Oh, did I mention both places are free? Cheapskate, but can’t really blame me. Blame those VIPs that my friends knew.

Saturday, 23^rd Dec. 2006

Woke up late. Ate brunch and slept again, and there goes the day. 9pm, primary school small small gathering, so called. 10 people attended., which explained the “small small” part. Updated myself with the latest gossips. You know, like who’s with who, who went where, who broke up with who, who doing what, how is who and who…etc. Manage to catch up with my cousin and aunts for the customary football session. Did the usual crazy commentating with my cousin and enjoyed laughing at our own jokes. Lame, but….fun.

Sunday, 24^th Dec. 2006.

Seperti biasa. Paced the house till evening. Find my old time dude. Exchange news. Went football together-gether. Old times. Rushed home for a bath and attended a Christmas Eve beach party at the private beach at Crown Prince Hotel. We indulge ourselves with pizzas, KFCs, salads and various edible craps. Then had some water-bomb-and-throw-me-into-the-sea sessions. Did some camwhoring. And get into trouble…

Enjoying the fireworks after some water-splashing session

…and of all things, I forgot to switch off my car lights. >O<. And so…u noe what happened….Tried to jump start the car but failed. Guess the battery went totally flat. Anyway, credit to my mates. They made every effort to make the car start. Thanks. In the end, we had to abandon the car on a pedestrian. Took Kelvin’s car home. Get some advice from dad, obviously. It was already 2.30am.

Monday, 25^th Dec. 2006.

Retrieve car first thing in the morning with dad, invested RM130. Sheesh. Went to Queensbay Mall for the very first time, with dad, fit-for-home-only Tee, knee-cap trousers and a lousy pair of slippers. Was kinda embarrassed to walk in that kind of fashion sense, but dad assured me that as Penangnites, its normal. Er…ok.

The front view of 1U look-alike mall

Queensbay Mall is definitely a new concept for Penangnites. Many of its stores are first timers on the island. Maybe it is time the islanders become “in-nish”. On the other hand, I would like to see how long are the stores are going to survive. Instinct tells me that Penangnites don’t usually embrace the style and taste that is offered there. But, we’ll see.

Tuesday, 26^th Dec. 2006

Went Pulau Tikus for breakfast. Have a nice drive around Georgetown. Dad was inputting me with the road names and where to get the best food here and there. Had Koay Teow Teng for lunch near Transfer Road. Its known as Ah Boy KTT, and is known to be the best KTT in Penang. I like their meat and fish balls; they are absolutely springy and tasty. I tried to made them stay in my mouth as long as possible. XD.

Hungry? Best KTT in Penang for you.

Wednesday, 27th Dec. 2006

A lazy morning. A lazy afternoon. A rough evening of footie. A great night with cousins. End of day.

To be continued....

Felt Good

I am having mood swings now.

And the swing reached the good part.

For the first of many many days, I was smiling to myself at the end of the day. I don't do that often nowadays.

Its a mystery that things happen in streaks. Good or bad. And somehow I felt good things, or should I say better things, happened today.

To start my better days, I got my results for IPC and got highest in class. The second best part of it is, I did not study. Yeah, fuck me if you are lamenting that life's unfair. Well, you know what? It ISN'T(refer previous post). And now I am enjoying the great part of it.

And the best part is, I am one-up....nah, too little....ten thousand up than THE person. One thing that I learned; you don' t have to be an ass-licker to be popular. In fact, it makes matters worse. You don't have to be the one that helps the lecturer to collect the exam papers, clean the white board, being complimenting, nodded your head 24/7 eventhough u don't know a god-damn thing about what the lecturer talked about, asked the class to shut up because the lecturer just show her/his face, lick their shoes, suck their cock...whateverrr. Just be yourself....study, get results and make fun...i mean, have fun, and the lecturer will take note of you. On your face, cock suckerrrr...

And that's it. I am happy. Yeah, I am easy to please. Who cares? Just being myself.

Abstract

Why me?

Do I really deserve the treatment?

Do I?

Things seems to be au fait for everyone. Not me.

The pressure is on.

Do I really deserve to feel hurt over and over again?
Do I really miss my chances everytime?
Do I really need to be left as the loser all the time?
Do I really have to feel emptiness?
Do I really have to be left out all the time?
Do I really have to be a step later than others?

Do I?

Fate is playing its cards brilliantly.
And I lost everytime. Big time.

Streaks are suppose to end.
Mine wasn't.
It's never ending......

Birthday and Kim Gary

It was Len's Birthday. And we decided to celebrate it at Kim Gary Restaurant at Avenue K, KLCC.
Noticed the slight different on the name...it was now called Kim Gary Beyond. Dunno why....probably they merge with HK band Beyond...

Anyway, this entry was supposed to be about all the food that we had in the restaurant...but gee...my friends slightly abused my camera...so there isn't much I can illustrate about the restaurant..

But anyway...

A brief intro:

Kim Gary Beyond is a Popular Hong Kong chain that provides HK style food. Its price range for a proper meal is about RM11-RM20.

The restaurant's (at least this branch) theme is yellow. The atmosphere's nice, just a lil' packed.

My personal fave main course is














Cheese Baked Rice with Pork Chop with Borsch(Borch? Borchs? forget the spelling) soup and a tiny dish of jelly with a free drink(took "ying yong"). Very aromatic and filling. Worth the price (RM16.50). The pork was kinda stiff tho but the whole concept just suits my appetite.
















My very personal favourite side dish is the French Toast. I totally recommended it. It smells(and tastes) like...like...heaven. Umph. Every time I put one serving in my mouth, I jsut wished that it stays there forever. Basically, I did not enjoy much, coz my greedy classmates just keep asking: " Can I have one piece pleeeaaase?" The request was repeated about 5-6 times.
By the way, its best serve hot.
















One of the course kinda impressed me...its called Stone Rice(direct Chinese translation)...its serve in a stone bowl, which, at least what my classmate believe, makes it very aromatic. Anyhow, it did looked nice and I liked the cute lil' squid that comes with it. Yeap, its the reddish thingy. Pity I had to execute those.

Part of this entry will be dedicated to my friend's birthday......















The cake















The birthday girl.

Everyone of us are entitled to be fed by the b'day girl....















"I want the spoon too!"















No choice.....















"Lai la...mum mum....say aahh.."


And lastly...















the reluctant me....

Happy B'day, Len! ",)

Confessions of a Sinner

Week 8 sounds like week 3. As weeks dragged by, the motivation to study hits a low point, so low that books were not even the last thing on my mind.

Beginning of sem, I promised to complete assignments right after I got it. I promised to work harder for mid-terms. I promised not to procrastinate. I promised that I wanted to raise my CGPA. I promised this...I promised that...

Mid-week of week 8, I felt I was cheating to myself I am doing just fine, everything's ok, assignments completed, studying hard. I lied. My mom got the bait too. I felt sorry.

I looked at the mirror this morning and I saw the word S-I-N-N-E-R spelled on my head. It was so obvious, as if it was burned into me with a charcoal stick. I tried to comfort myself I was doing just fine. But this time, it wasn't the case anymore. I can't go on cheating myself.

So I tried to wash away the burned words on my forehead. It didn't go away. Suddenly, I realized it won't work like that. I started to ponder.

Lately, I felt my life was in chaos. I wasn’t myself at times. Sins I committed at great lengths, at least to my measure. So many things went through my head; I just dunno where to start. Perhaps making a list now might help……

Primarily, studies. As I said, I promised to be incentive and that ain’t the case now. I didn’t realize that until mid-term today. I did not study for mid-term for the first time. Tho it did not turn out bad, I felt something’s wrong. I wasn’t concerned. I did not feel nervous as usual. Something’s just wrong. Assignments too. The question papers was left collecting dusk at the top of my shelf. I don’t even bother to look at it. I didn’t realize it until today when I told my friend(he usually left it till the last minute) and he said: “Dude, welcome to the in-group!” It was funny at that time. But as I sat on my desk, I feel terrible about myself.

My mom called two days ago, reminded me that it was the 15th day of lunar calendar, which means vegetarian time for me. My mom didn’t insist me on doing that, its just me that feel obliged to my faith. In the end, I ended up with McD for lunch and pork for dinner. I didn’t realize it till today. I felt guilty.

I felt I’m taking advantage of people now. Twice, Thomas wasn’t around when I wanted to lend his bike. I took it anyway. Then I called him just to tell him I pinjamed the bike. I called to tell, not to ask for permission, twice. Even though if he didn’t mind, I felt at fault with myself. I didn’t realize that until I was sitting on my desk and stared at his bike key..

Emotional dissonance doesn’t make my life better. Recently, I have been meditative about choices for my love life. I imagined the scenarios that I would be in if I was with this or that girl. In the end, I was just left confused. I was just fantasizing and the feelings caught me. Eventually, I think I was just cheating myself with the options that won’t really materialize. I didn’t realize it till I saw a couple went by me on my way back from dinner..

Nowadays, I cursed and cursed and cursed. So bad was the cursing that I felt disgusted of myself. But the cursing won’t stop. I tried and I failed miserably to avoid it. Then I told myself it was fine to curse. I didn’t realize how wrong I was until I saw somebody else was cursing away when they talked. It was disgusting and so impolite. Then I imagined looking at myself.

After a series of analyzing, perhaps I should start healing my burned wound and cleansing my sins. All I need is a little time and faith. Perhaps, a personal therapy might help. No more cheating of myself. Is time to wake up from the dead.

Hindered

Obsession has a new name. Previously, I was very very into a band called Theory of a Deadman. There are still cool for me. It is just that there hasn’t been any progress that I know of, and listening to the same all songs they performed also bored me anyway. Anyhow, they are a great band with a romantic-heartbreaking-theme in most of their songs. They were quite much alike to Nickelback in style.

Songs that I truly recommended are:
Santa Monica
Me and My Girl
In the Middle
Better-off
Hello Lonely

…..and so much more.

Oh….as I said…obsession has a new name.

And its spelled H-I-N-D-E-R.

Oh yes. They are like what marijuana and cocaine are to drug addicts for me now. Their songs were absolutely soothing, in terms of their rhythm, not to mention their lyrics. Fascinating stuff really.

Currently they are promoting their album Extreme Behaviour, with the hit single Lips of an Angel. For me, Lips of an Angel is like what thrillers are to on-coming movies. Thus, it is strongly, absolutely recommended to get whatever songs they produced.

Songs that had impressed me(actually all of their songs already did) are….

Better Than Me
Get Stoned
Bliss
Shoulda
Nothing Good About Goodbye

I am still in the process of discovering them (downloading a lot of their songs for one).
Do check them out.

Website: www.hinderonline.com/

Don’t let ignorance Hinder you.

Joke's Bond. James Bond.

Due to the wave of the womanizer a.k.a. spy a.k.a. Aston Martin addict sweeping the mass media, I decided to cash in with my own James Bond thingy.







My friend last night told me this joke about how Bond came to get his name.

Bond boarded in China during one of his mission, suffering partial memory lost due to shipwreck. He forgot his name.
Of course, his basic instinct never leave him and he fell for a Chinese lady at first sight. So, they...you know the rest la...
As they were having their time, Bond groaned: " Oh yeah...say my name...say my name...."
The Chinese lady, who do not know a single English word, got high and was shouting: "Zhen shi bang! Zhen shi bang! (Damn good! Damn good!)"

Note "zhen shi bang" sounded like James Bond......if you get what it meant.

Just being wu laio.... XD

Bloody Donation

Never thought I wanted to be in one. I had always this...erm....ah....fe...fea...oh yes...fear(admitted sheepishly)...to go for blood donations. Nothing to do with fear of looking at blood. Its just thanks to a particular media report about one guy donated blood and got AIDS after that. Whats worse is the asshole hospital do not give compensation or even apologize to the Samaritan.

Now that turned me off whenever "blood donation" comes to mind. That is , till now.

The First Aid Unit(FAU) in my college had been promoting the event as if there was a mega sales in the college hall. As a result, thousands flooded the college hall for this 5 day event. Afterall, it did look like a mega sales event.

As usual, I was ignorant of the event until my friends were talking about it.

An: Oi, wan donate blood ah?
Me: Hah? Since when you become so benevolent?
An: Walau...u see me like tat one ah?
Vince: Ya...we do.
An: Luk chat...
Vince: So, u wanna go for it?
Me: Er....
An: Aiya...scared hoh? Maybe we sut check u got balls onot? *started to bend down*
Me: What? Me? Nola...er.....okla...go la....

And then the next thing I knew, I was escorted there..

















The process was a long one. First, we had a weight measurement.
I found out mine was 66kg...oh well, lost weight, not what I planned.

Then, came the register part. Answered a lot of wu liao question like "adakah anda mempunyai hubungan sejenis?"

Hubungan sejenis(one type species realtionship)? What the hell? Of course la. Its like asking whether you have sex with dogs or cats or horses.

Then I looked next to the sentence and found the English translation: "Do you have homosexual partners?"

Ohhhhh....cheh...

Next its the blood examination part. Found out, for the first time in 19 years, I was type B.

Then checked whether I got high blood pressure. Seems normal.

Then some registration again. Picked up some blood bags and time to go.

Now to the major event.
















We were guided onto The Chair. And the nurse started their process. As the needles spit out liquid, my nerves jolted. And the next thing was, I got injected. It kinda bit me, so I din see the process.

Next the nurse insert a whole freaking big "drain entrance" into my skin. Slowly. My eyes bulged as it went in. And in just one second...my blood was on travelling around 180kmph to the blood bag.

So, me and my friend just lied down, relaxed and talked crap to release tension. My friend said it needed 30 minutes for the process to be done when he was first here. *nods head*

Approximately 5 minutes later, the nurse came and started to prepare for the ending process. Both of us were amazed. Who say 30 minutes? Mine was completed in 7 minutes! I looked at my friend and he just shrugged.

The nurse cut off the drain and put the bag full of my own blood on my thigh. Walau...imagine a huge chunk of blood right in front of your eyes. I can feel the thing wobbling on my thigh. My friend needed a little while longer.

Lastly, to make sure that we don't faint afterwards, the FAU prepared light meals for us outside the hall.

















And so, I lost 450ml of blood...to charity. Felt so noble now.